Angst? Me? Never.

In response to:It actually never stops

2009-11-19T19:03:00+01:00

Do hope you're feeling better now than when you wrote this.

So sad when you say you hate yourself. You sound such a lovely, thoughtful, caring person to me. xx

In response to:Don't be so mean!

2009-11-15T22:55:00+01:00

most definately there goes alot into love, ie., they might have annoying habits :)) or you for them a meet up is a necessity! ;) XXX

In response to:Don't be so mean!

2009-11-15T16:18:40+01:00

Oh, of course - I'd forgotten about your mum going away. Good luck with all that. x

In response to:Don't be so mean!

2009-11-15T16:16:09+01:00

Yeah, I agree with that through having been on here for so long I just feel like in order to conduct the serious relationship that this is being treated as some talking might have been... helpful.

In response to:Don't be so mean!

2009-11-15T16:15:05+01:00

I'll try and write about it. The next few days are really, really busy though because my mum's away so I'm doing all her stuff, lol. x

In response to:Don't be so mean!

2009-11-15T16:13:56+01:00

Yeah, I agree with you about the making friends. I think you definitely need to speak or meet up in order to be anything more though. xx

In response to:Don't be so mean!

2009-11-15T14:21:17+01:00

I agree with Aly: words carry a lot of power even if they are "just" a txt.

In response to:Don't be so mean!

2009-11-15T14:03:35+01:00

Glad you can type and listen to here at the same time.

Most men find it very hard to talk about feelings, even when they (aka we) claim to be in love.

:) Hope you'll have time to write about your trip to Stratford.

In response to:Don't be so mean!

2009-11-15T13:52:51+01:00

You can get close to people via text etc., or have realy strong feelings however to truely love someone you need to see them and spend time with them.

i don't think your being bitchy, i think your being a realist.

XXX

In response to:Ignorance, always ignorance.

2009-11-10T16:40:45+01:00

The benifits office,annoy the people on purpose.Thats their way of sending out whatever signal they want to send out.
Good to know that you stood up against the bullies.Well done.

In response to:Ignorance, always ignorance.

2009-11-09T21:32:25+01:00

happy birthday!
have fun at twelth night x

In response to:Ignorance, always ignorance.

2009-11-06T22:10:15+01:00

Bully for you to stand up for your family and benefits in general! (I totally agree with you, btw) It sounds to me you did not behave at all like the wimp you feared you were the other day. Hope that's made you feel a bit good about yourself.

Have a brilliant time In Stratford. Look forward to seeing the photos - and your review of Twelth Night. xx

In response to:Ignorance, always ignorance.

2009-11-06T21:21:37+01:00

yeah! Stratford is this weekend I remembered!! :D

as for the benefits thing, GOOD FOR YOU! I would too, no you can't judge someone AT all, people like to pigeon hole others and that's really wrong in my opinion.

I take people for how they treat me, give out what you give back. There are others out there that are very judgemental. They give it out, they deserve it back in my opinion!! no seriously, doesn't matter what your history is, or situation. None of their business at all.

If peeps are nice to me, I'll do everything for them if I can, if they treat me badly, it does take awhile (i'm terrible for giving peeps second/third chances when maybe i should say 'no') but I do walk away I have in the past. I come from a realy diverse family, nothing wrong in it, my family is colourful and I like that :yes: :>> we are completely unique!

In the past people have judged harshly close family. I mean really harshly, ok, my step gramp is black, most of his family are also and some of my cousins. Can you see where I'm going with this?

I think your alot like me which I love as a mate, it takes alot for you to snap, so I back you on today completely, it needed to be done ;) XXX

In response to:God can be so hilarious, ha ha

2009-11-06T08:47:39+01:00

The more I read it, the more it impresses me. I don’t know how I ever worked without hilarious and funny things in our life, Life would be so much easier especially when there's a jokes here and there. Being funny is nice because a lot of serious people are lacking with this kind of behavior that is why they are much look older. I would like to thank you for your outstanding blog post. Keep it up! Awesome!

In response to:I can so do this.

2009-11-05T07:29:12+01:00

Are you going to Stratford today? Have a wonderful time. x

In response to:Make A Little Birdhouse In Your Soul

2009-11-02T20:39:33+01:00

Terrific you wrote so much yesterday.

So, by no means for the first time, I was completely wrong in my adivce to you!

Maybe if you skip college tomorrow, you can write a whole lot more....

x

In response to:I can so do this.

2009-10-30T23:17:58+01:00

It sounds to me as if by far the freakiest thing is looking after John with only a little help from your grandmum. It's a pity that doesn't happen before Stratford, so you could look forward to that as a sort of reward.

Btw, how far is your house from the station? Do hope your gran can drive you.

IMHO, the writing project might just be one stresy thing to much - though obviously it would be great if you could do it.

xx alec

In response to:I can so do this.

2009-10-30T13:01:01+01:00

Wow you've got alot planned for November ;) sounds fabulous seeing the play though!! :yes:

Believe me hehe! 17 isn't old!! i'm 21 again!! LOL!! :)) x

In response to:I can so do this.

2009-10-30T12:34:56+01:00

Sounds like a busy month. Make sure you get some rest in too, won't you?

17 isn't old. 18 is old :-)

In response to:Life since I last blogged

2009-10-27T14:28:00+01:00

You are not being stupid by owning up to your feelings! Feelings are never 'wrong', although sometimes they hide other feelings even more umcomfortable...

Personally. I can understand your feelings of insecurity in the present situation, particularly as you have been so supportive of your mum for so long.

I hope one day you will feel close to someone in a way that puts these family things into perspective.

alec

In response to:In which I'm kind of a dork

2009-10-26T23:49:22+01:00

I've seen the Truman Show and Truly Madly Deeply - I want to see Up but I don't think I'll ever watch Camp Rock :)

Sometimes I feel a bit like I'm living in a Truman Show type world - because I live on a beautiful island and never go off it any more because I love my small cosy little life here so much now and it does feel as though it is too good to be true - with just little dramas here and there to make it not too boring.

I loved the film - but from my point of view now - I would want to stay oblivious if I were him and just enjoy the nice life. But watching the film I was glad he escaped.

Truly, Madly Deeply is sort of along the same lines isn't it?

They are both stories of how a person has to choose between carrying on with something that is what they are used to and comfortable with or making their minds up to move on to something new and scary and take a chance on being their own people and making new lives for themselves.

I cried a lot during T, M D. I would have stayed in the house living with the ghost forever given the choice.

I think both those films prove I am a huge cowardy custard deep at heart. But I love them anyway.

In response to:In which I'm kind of a dork

2009-10-26T17:42:52+01:00

agreed the truman show is my fav ;) X

In response to:In which I'm kind of a dork

2009-10-26T17:10:53+01:00

I think The Truman Show is a great film. It's cheery tone just gets creepier as the film goes on.

In response to:Life since I last blogged

2009-10-26T16:07:51+01:00

Yeah, I guess if I get to know them it'll be easier. This whole thing is just really new to me, lol.

Thanks xx

In response to:Life since I last blogged

2009-10-26T16:06:58+01:00

It wasn't an unhappy childhood. There were unhappy times, but there were plenty of good ones too.

I don't really know. I just don't want someone to come in and change everything, mostly. I'm just kind of scared of being pushed out. But then I know that wouldn't really happen. I'm just being stupid :roll:. Once I get used to it I know I'll be fine.

In response to:Life since I last blogged

2009-10-25T21:10:23+01:00

I think the very best way to deal with your feelings re: friend and kids is to keep training yourself to cope.

You will get used to them in time if they stay in your life, if they don't then no need to make a big thing about it.

I even hazard a guess that if they stay around you might actually get to like them.

In the meantime you are definitely allowed to have reservations and a feeling of awkwardness about them. Glad you can talk to your guitar teacher, I know my son finds his music teacher very much a kindred spirit and it is nice to have someone in your life like that. Good luck with the music - it sounds like a good thing to sink into and lose yourself.

You coped very well with John - I'm impressed with how you handled it. It is good that you know when to ask for help. Good for you.

In response to:Life since I last blogged

2009-10-25T19:40:11+01:00

Tell me to mind my own business, but maybe the sight of your mum with this guy and his children brings back painful memories of your unhappy childhood. x

In response to:This man

2009-10-19T14:04:24+02:00

Actually i can imagine you giving him an angry speech.

And then throwing bowls at him

In response to:In which I am slightly ... cryptic

2009-10-18T22:50:23+02:00

I had a secret then I told someone. And I wish I never had opened my big gob! Some things are better kept to yourself...

In response to:The things I should really keep to myself

2009-10-18T16:16:10+02:00

The two smart folks above have offered sound advise. I will just echo what they said.