Ok, this has gone just a bit weird.
I feel dead. Well, not dead but not alive. Not crying tho, which is a good thing as I think Blink 182 were getting a bit sick of it (don't ask).
I probably shouldn't say this but I don't want to be dealing with it on my own anymore.
On one side, Beckie making me think she's going to have bled to death by the morning...
On the other side Jesse telling me that she's going to kill herself. For the second night running.
I don't know what to say.
What can I say?
I don't want you to kill yourself but I can't stop you... but then if she went and did it then it'd be my fault.
And with Beckie.. she refuses to get offline help so I don't know what to do.
I used to be really good at understanding. But the more I fill my head up with shit the less I understand everyone elses.
Mum & Hugh are out on their own.
I said something about it being blindingly obvious they's back together yesterday night and mum didn't deney it.
I call it spineless.
But then I feel mean so I can't actually call it that.
John's had his tablet and gone to bed.
But last time it was just me & him something weird happened with the epilepsi just after mum got back. And it's really hot today so I'm too scared to go to bed cause if I feel asleep and something happened...
Well, I'm not even gunna go there.
So I have to stay WIDE AWAKE.
This isn't helped by the fact I had no sleep last night because there was a massive spider in the house that I couldn't stop thinking about and I was too hot. I would get myself coffee or something but then I think I would actually boil over.
I'm hungry.
It might be a bit ironic to have breakfast cereal.
But then it might not be cause I'm not actually 100% sure what ironic means or when you're sposed to say it.
It's too hotttttttttt.
I'm bored.
My back hurts.
I'm miserable.
Mum & hugh are back together.
All my online friends want to kill themselves.
